kasandra with a k

egg-rolls:

one time i got a sample from the tea store at the mall and as i walked away the guy said “tea you later” and then his coworker smacked him

(via holla-bread)

dallonjames:

when I was like 7 I found my brother’s porn on his computer and it was this story about a girl and she went to this mechanics place but she didn’t have any money so she payed with like sex and then so I thought that was how you paid for everything so once we went to target and I started unbuttoning my pants and my mother started screaming

(via sheatemyshirt)

dietchola:

i’m terrified of lady bugs because when i was 10 my bathroom got infested by them and they laid eggs in my shower but i didn’t know that so when i went to take a shower one time i turned on the water and thousands of lady bugs came flying out of the drain and i sat in the bathtub and i cried

(via holla-bread)

If girls had a penis for a day:

layla-k:

seex-weed-dubstep:

i-say-no-to-status-quo:

No I’ll be more like :

OR

you forgot one

I CAN’T BREATHE

Omfg i cant

LMFAO OMG .

(Source: mynameiscomedy, via kaex33)